Tuesday, August 18, 2015

When life is a mess...


*****
You never wanted to know how to survive divorce.
You never wanted to know the joys and heartaches of autism.
You never wanted to know the signs of addiction.
But you do.
You never wanted to know loss so devastating that your mind has trouble believing it’s true.
You never wanted to know how to leave an abusive relationship.
You never wanted to know it was possible to bounce back after a financial crisis.
But you do.
You never wanted to know the pain of caring for a parent who doesn’t remember you.
You never wanted to be the strong one.
You never wanted to know the car could be a safe place to cry.
But you do.
You never wanted to know a family could break.
You never wanted to know how to put the pieces back together in a new way.
You never wanted to know a new normal.
But you do.
You never wanted to know the perfect response when someone stares at your child.
You never wanted to know the courage it takes to ask for help.
You never wanted to know how to find joy after having lost it for so long.
But you do.
You never wanted to know when it’s time to sever the ties in order to have inner peace.
You never wanted to know how hard it is to say to yourself, “Enough is enough. My loved ones deserve better. Change starts today.”
You never wanted to know the weight that can be lifted when you say to yourself, “It wasn’t my fault.”
But you do.
You do.
And perhaps as time has passed you’ve discovered that to deny your story hurts more than the story itself.
So you’ve chosen to own it.
To speak out, even when your voice shakes.
To tell the truth, even when it’s not pretty.
To encourage someone else, even when you can barely encourage yourself.
To get up and face the world, even when you can barely look at yourself in the mirror.
You didn’t ask for this story, but it’s yours, and you’re owning it.
And I thank you for that. I thank you.
The tears that streak your face at the most inopportune times of the day, at the most inappropriate moments, are the lines of your story. And when you own it, someone else is not alone in his or hers.
Though you feel like a mess, you are providing a vital message.

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